The BPE lives!

To the many thousands (and especially to young Dos) who have been inconsolate during my brief absence, I am alive and well! The duties of professing at the world's finest University are demanding indeed. Fear not, I will be returning to my duties of spreading the love for Notre Dame and the hate for ill-conceived leftist politics with earnest.

Last weekend was not a good one. I was fairly confident that the beloved Irish would handle the Men of Skunk without too much trouble. In fact, we should have. We moved the ball with ease (minus a possession or two during the third quarter in which the proverbial wheels appeared to fall off). What ailed us was the defense and special teams. We can't punt a ball more than 35 yards in the air to save our lives. And it continues to befuddle me why such a wonderful institution as Notre Dame du Lac cannot find a placekicker who can launch the ball beyond in the opponent's five yard line with consistency.

But the biggest issue was the defense. We made 170 pound feeble armed Tate Forcier look like the next coming of Joe Montana. In reality, the kid is but a brittle skunk bear whose body will surely not last the season. Rich Rodriguez is a hick and an absolute pitiful excuse for a man. After the game, his comment was "It came down to the last play. What a day to be MEATCHICKEN." What an effing clown. Surely he could have said something like "I would like to thank the Big Eleven referees, and Dick Honig, Michigan graduate in the replay booth, for calling EVERY EFFING CALL our way. So guys, the next beer is on me. To Charlie, I'm sorry that we had to resort to using the refs to EFF you."

It took me a day or two to recover, with you I will be honest. I felt like a drunken ship sailing aimlessly about the southern most seas, headed for nowhere in general but trouble in particular.

But then return to the campus of NOTRE DAME DU LAC on the morn of Monday, my blood began once again to flow, blue and gold and sometimes green, in fact. The sun shone. The leaves glistened. The birds chirped.

We WILL DESTROY THE SPARTANS OF MICHIGAN AGRICULTURAL COLLEGE! D'Antonio and his hooligans have planted one too many flags, and it is now their turn to PAY.

What tho the odds be great or small,
Old Notre Dame will win over all,
While HER loyal sons are marching onward to victory!

The BPE -- out.